Textliste englisch | textlist english

{title} TABU I-IV

Shown is the Now, this Now. The Now; it has already ceased to exist the moment it is shown; the Now that is, is other than that which is shown, ... The Now, as it is shown to us, is 'ein gewesenes' (something-that-has-been), and this is its truth; ...

{title} Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel: Phenomenology of the Spirit.
{title} PREFACES (prefacing images)

Diary, take one, first shot.
This film could begin
like this or like that:
I sit down at my desk
In front of me my four diaries:
I'm taking NOW...

{title} NOW

...NOW the most recent one,
and put it down.
Then I open it up,
and write in it.

This is ... my diary.
This is my hand.
And ... this is the clock,
it is now ...

This is the clock,
it's now about 8:30,
or thereabouts.
And ... these are the little pictures.

After 2 pictures comes the

{textual motif} TITLE

{title} TABU I-IV


{title} PREFACES (prefacing remarks) (1978 ff.)

{textual motif} 1979

{title} DIARY I (1979-1981)

{textual motif} diary? - perhaps? - perhaps! - So what!

Now, I've had the idea of writing a diary for some time now. But today an experience motivated me to begin - a dream. In retrospect I find that this dream was pretty meaningful.

Ouch! 2:40
The anaesthesiologist was just here and explained to me: Eat as usual, drink up until 9:00, take the pill with your last sip. Early in the morning, - oh shit, I just moaned -,...

{textual motif} 1980

... transfusion, shot in the bum, total anaesthesia in ER. I'm allowed to brush my teeth. Tubes thru the nose, whereby a piece of a tooth or whole tooth can be broken off, because he had to push aside the larynx with an instrument,...

{textual motif} ...whether I should ask the doctor who's operating on me to give me the removed piece of my tongue in chloroform. I'm even thinking of a 'possible' artwork...

I'm going to be left with hoarseness and sore throats. Before he removes the tube and me from the ventilator, he wakes me up to ask if I need to throw up. "Can I judge that?". "Yes". It was only a precaution, he does that with such operations. The blood that flows into the stomach is usually vomited,...

{textual motif} The tongue really now looks shorter.

...little bits were already sunctioned up. It was a difficult operation, three to four hours; my jaw was sewn shut, and if I had to throw up,...

{textual motif} When will I be able to speak again.

...the wires would have to be quickly reopened. My hands twitch for the moment, I have to breathe in deeply and exhaled heavily...

{textual motif} (The tongue becomes handy again.)

...He said: "What's the use of the best progenie-operation and the patient is dead!" Oh and Ouch! (When will I be able to laugh about this Oh and Ouch?) (I gotta breathe heavily, have to yawn. I'm afraid of the operation, of what I'm experiencing. I only hope I'll survive. ...)

{textual motif} Gerd heard me talking in my sleep last night; apparently I began: "I'm now talking in my sleep." Then a lot of incomprehensible stuff followed.

...A God, belief in a God could help me now. Lord Almighty! It's not as ironic as it sounds). Afterwards, I knew, were I to arrive at the intensive care unit. I didn't know!...

At the next beep it is
{textual motif} 1981

...Yes, apparently they always do this the first night. Round-the-clock attention. Then I'd learn it too. I approached the anaestheologist about it, what one hears about the intensive care unit, how many come out. He wared it aside: it' s not like that.

{textual motif} Testament: who knows what it's good for

{title} intensive care unit

{textual motif} Can you bring me a mirror?

{textual motif} Can I also may get a shot to kill the pain?

{title} DIARY II (1981-1982)
{title} before
{title} after

{textual motif} It can't always remain this way forever.

{title} here
{title} now

{textual motif} This residence is squattered.

{textual motif} lalü

{title} Trip to Italy (1981-82)

{textual motif} Ven-gooo! - ooooh!

At the next beep it is
{textual motif} 1982

{textual motif} Prelim. Study for the concl.

{textual motif} Trip in I

{textual motif} Berlin / Berlin / Berlin / Berlin / THE / 1st / DEAD

{textual motif} SEPTEMBER, RAGE, A Journey

Good God! What is man but a poor, good animal. - goody God!

{textual motif} The beauty of the subjunctive.

{title} DIARY III (1982-1987)

At the next beep it is
{textual motif} 1983

{textual motif} THE DEATHSTRIP - A German Film

{title} A German Film
{title} so fare - so good

{textual motif} THE RHINE - A German Fairy Tale

At the next beep it is
{textual motif} 1984

{textual motif} Orpheus

{textual motif} SILENT MOVIE For Deaf People

{textual motif} FROM THE FOUR SEASONS

At the next beep it is
{textual motif} 1985

{textual motif} SILENT MOVIE For Deaf People

{textual motif} In Turin I got fucked. If I die from AIDS because of that I'll be furious (up in Heaven)

At the next beep it is
{textual motif} 1986

{textual motif} JESUS - THE FILM

{textual motif} Testamento Memori

{textual motif} VERONIKA (vera ikon)

Hoc est corpus meum, - this is my body. Take and eat

{title} a Film by

At the next beep it is
{textual motif} 1987

{title} Death Dance
{title} DIARY IV (1987 - ...)

It is known that Achilles runs faster than a tortoise...

{textual motif} SIMULATION OF HELL

10 - 9 - 8 - 7 - 6 - 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1 - too bad!

At the next beep it is
{textual motif} 1988

That's it, then!

Diary, take one, first shot.
Diary, take one, twentysecond shot.
Diary, take two, first shot.

The race between Achilles and the tortoise.
It is known that Achilles runs faster than a tortoise. Nonetheless, Achilles will never catch the tortoise, even though the tortoise has only a slight headstart. For when Achilles catches up to the tortoise, at point A, the tortoise has already advanced to point B. If Achilles reaches point B, then the tortoise will already be at point C, and so on ad infinitum.

{title} before
{title} after

{textual motif} TITLE

{title} TABU I-IV

{textual motif} now / here

like this or like that.

{textual motif} End

this film could end like this or like that.

{textual motif} EPILOGUE

{title} EPILOGUE

this film could end like this or like that.

{textual motif} I / TABOO

this film could end like this or like that.

{textual motif} before / after / now / here / {signature}

this film could end like this or like that or similar.

...like this or like that.

ending - End

It's now exactly 28 minutes {peep}
later - Thank you for your attention!

{translation: Alice Kuzniar}